Open his eyes so he may see

My favorite season is summer. I love the heat, the sun, the freedom, and the lack of responsibility I have as a non-working teacher during summer. The Pacific Ocean is warm enough to venture into and snorkel on a nice, calm day. The Atlantic Ocean is like a heated pool and you could spend the entire day in it if you pleased. Each year I wait for summer to come as I make my way through the remaining seasons.

We all experience life seasons (George, 2009). Right now my season is winter - a cold, dark, long winter (much like the winter I imagine my sister experiencing in Alaska). Others are experiencing a summer, where life is good and you are drifting on the floaties God has provided you. Some are in the midst of a spring, coming out of a winter in which God has been teaching you something, but you are now in the process of actually seeing the growth of the fruit of His spirit. Others may be in fall, your easy summer days have gone and you are approaching a change that may lead to winter. It is promised to us that we will have trials in life, so we will all experience each season several times throughout our lives (John 16:33). Unfortunately, winter always comes, and that's where I am right now. I am grieving the loss of my beloved boyfriend and I haven't quite figured out how to be okay, but I have at least made my way back to God's word.

It is easy to see God at work when we are in a summer, a spring, or even fall, but winter... not-so-much. God says He is always there, right by our side, but from personal experience, I sure don't feel His presence. If I feel any presence at all, it's His back - His loving arms turned away from me. The poem, Footprints paints this picture that God carries us through our troubles (which I might add that it's on a beautiful beach, well I would like to suggest a setting change, you can see footprints just as well in the snow, and let's face it, the trials that Footprints is relating to are winter trials). In the midst of all of this, it is difficult to believe that God is by our side or even carrying us through our troubles (Joshua 1:9, Psalm 23:4, Isaiah 41:10, Matthew 28:20). It is easier for our human minds to understand rejection and abandonment rather than all-loving grace and comfort, but God's ways are the latter (2 Corinthians 1:3-4). Even as I write this I am fighting it, but I do believe that scripture is God-breathed so I must believe what He says (2 Timothy 3:16). One day I was looking for a favorite verse of mine, which is in 1 Kings (1 Kings 19:11-13, FYI), but on my way there I came across a highlighted verse that stopped me in my tracks.

"Don't be afraid," the prophet answered. Those who are with us are more than those are with them. And Elisha prayed, "Open his eyes, Lord, so that he may see. Then the Lord opened the servant's eyes, and he looked and saw the hills full of horses and chariots of fire all around Elisha. (2 Kings 16-17)

In all my wintry grief, I have lost sight of God's action in my life. I cannot see past my pain and my flesh is sure that God is on vacation with all the summer dwellers or busy watering the fruit of the people in spring, He's certainly not choosing to spend winter at my house. The truth is, He is, He has no bounds, He can be with me in all my pain and with you in all your joy at the same time (Psalm 34:18, Romans 8:38-39, 2 Corinthians 1:3-4, 2 Corinthians 2:14). This verse though, it was God speaking to me, which supports that He is with me even though I don't feel it. I wrote it on a post-it note immediately and hung it in my car. There are three major things I took away from this verse:

1. Elisha proclaimed God's presence
2. Elisha asked for God's help through prayer
3. The servant looked and then saw

First, Elisha proclaimed God's presence by stating to not be afraid. That God's army is far greater than the earthly army in front of us. Elisha was being chased down by a powerful king to be captured. He had no fear because he knew with all his heart that God would come through and He boldly proclaimed that. When he spoke to God's power and asked for help, God delivered! Elisha was not captured and he came out on top. Wouldn't that be nice, to have such confidence in the Lord, even in times of danger or great despair? This is what He is trying to tell us in this verse, have confidence in me, I've got your back.

Next, Elisha asked for God's help through prayer. Elisha knew he didn't have the power without God. With God, all things are possible, but when we seek power apart from Him, it will not pan out (Matthew 17:19-21). Elisha asked God, with bold confidence, to allow his servant to see what he was seeing in order to give him the same confidence Elisha had. How many times have you tried to control things in your life out of fear or lack of confidence in God? I know I take control of things and end up telling God what I need or what He needs to do. Who am I to tell the Creator of this universe what to do? 

Finally, the servant looked and then saw. Elisha could have prayed to God and told the servant to chill out until his face turned blue, but the last thing that needed to happen was for the servant to
actually believe what he heard and look for it. The movie Hook comes to mind. When the adult Peter Pan was training to fight Hook to get his children back, he had to believe in the magic of Neverland. Peter was starving after a long day of training so he and the Lost Boys sat down at the dinner table, but to Peter's disappointment, he saw a table full of empty dishes. It was only when Peter believed and looked for the food (through a food fight) that it actually appeared. The servant needed to take that last step of believing Elisha's proclamation and prayer before He would actually see the unseen army that backed them up. He needed this step to move forward in the same confidence Elisha had. 

As I further reflect on this verse, I know that I need to look for God in my life to see Him. I cannot throw a pity party for myself and what could have been for Harrison's life and also see God at work. I know God is there, I can proclaim with confidence that God's word is real and true and He is here. I pray (sometimes these days if I am being honest) but I know that others are praying for me for help through this grief. Now I need to look for Him and then (and only then) will I see Him. I will see that He is carrying me through my winter in the packed snow of a dark, wooded trail.

Which season are you in? Have you made your way out of a winter? 

George, E. (2009). Quiet Confidence for a Woman's Heart. Eugene, OR: Harvest House .